Tyra Banks, who is much better than you in every way, hosts this exciting new mixed-breed dog show. As is the case with America’s Next Top Model, contestants will be required to lick Tyra’s feet and beg and whine for scant attention. They will also be regularly and severely ridiculed by effeminate men in women’s clothing.
Each week, the losing contestant will be mercilessly scolded by a panel of judges for a prolonged period, and will then be personally euthanized by Tyra.
