Startling, yet generally incomprehensible new findings have revealed that the universe is largely comprised of “Dork Matter.” But what exactly is Dork Matter?
It's complicated...
According to Dr. Kraig Nibson, chairman of the Astrophysics department at the University of Wynonna, “Dork Matter is incredibly complex and counterintuitive, and is therefore utterly impossible for the vast majority of people to even begin to understand.”
“You need to be a complete and utter Nth-degree Dork to even begin to grasp it, hence the name,” says Nibson. “It is incomprehensible for Brainiacs, Techno-Dweebs, Super-Weanies, and even Uber-Geeks. You really need to be a card-carrying, stone-cold righteous, quantum-spazzed Ultra Mega Dork to get a handle on this stuff.”
Dr. Nibson’s advice is, “don’t worry about it. Just go watch TV or something. We’ll let you know when we come across something you can understand.”
